So, I thought today would be the day—y’know, that cheesy “artist draws his muse” thing all the couples do on TikTok. She sits across from me, on the couch, draped in morning sunlight, looking like she just walked out of a perfume commercial. She says, “Babe, draw me like a goddess!” All right, cool... but there’s this weird vibe in the air. Her smile is sort of... off. A little too wide, a little too shiny. Maybe it’s just my nerves, or maybe she knows exactly what she’s doing.
My hands start sweating. Like, actual pools forming. Each time I glance up, her eyes are locked on me—hard. I’m trying to stay chill as I shade in her jawline, but every stroke feels like it could be the last. Is this what creative panic looks like? I mean, come on, wasn’t this supposed to be romantic?
Halfway through, I realize she isn’t moving. At all. Her face keeps morphing in my brain—eyes bulging, mouth stretching, like she’s auditioning for a horror flick. I’m not sure if she’s lost in her “sexy muse” mode or prepping to bite my head off. My heartbeat’s louder than my pencil, and I swear every artist ever must’ve suffered for love.
It’s full-on sprint mode now. I scribble faster, hands almost shaking the paper off the sketchpad. I’m itching to just be done. And finally, when I flip the sketch around—there it is. Not some dreamy portrait, but messy words in ugly handwriting. The truth, plain as day.
Honestly? If you ever get asked to “draw your girlfriend like a goddess,” RUN. Or at least keep a safe distance and have an emergency eraser on hand.
#relationshiphumor #expectationvsreality #sendhelp




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